life's better lived if you can hear a whisper of a happy ending...
Saturday, November 20, 2010
platonic relationships: can men and women just be friends and nothing else?
Experts Say Attitude Is Key To Successful Platonic Relationships
SHE thinks he is funny and smart. He thinks she has a great personality, and understands him. He's the one she calls at 1:00 a.m., distraught because she just broke up with the guy she was seeing and angry because he wasn't there when she needed him. She's the one on-call to respond to his inevitable personal crises, when he's problematic, sad and lonely.
They're platonic friends--at least for the moment. While the new century has brought with it a host of new rules in the interaction between men and women, the question still remains: Is a purely non-sexual relationship between members of the opposite sex possible? Or, in a society built around men and women pursuing fast friendships with the goal of physical and mental intimacy--and ultimately marriage--is it unrealistic to think that a friendship with a member the opposite sex can burn brightly without a romantic flame (or at least the thought of one) erupting in short order?
Even with the best intentions, being friends with someone of the opposite sex can be filled with challenges and fuzzy areas that--if not handled correctly--can doom a relationship before it even really begins. And add to that the platonic relationships in which one person begins to have thoughts and feelings that aren't so platonic, and the result can be what has been called "an incredibly tricky, potentially explosive experience," which many times ends in hurt feelings, confusion, anger and bitterness.
It's the dilemma i'm facing. You can be distant friends, if you only see each other every sooo often. But I don't think you can see each other every day without an attraction developing.
Relationship experts say that while there are plenty of horror stories out there, when honesty and mutual respect are present, sticky situations among friends can be worked out and can be very rewarding. Some women find that the most loyal, fun and easy-going friends are guys. Some men find that female friends give them perspective, add a certain calmness in their lives, and are good information resources when it comes to understanding females in general.